Modern Dating Trends: A Christian Perspective
Introduction
Another week and another post. This past week, I spent moving and preparing to sell a house, working, and playing a little Zelda Tears of The Kingdom. As I went through this week, I have really been trying to focus on rest, specifically mentally resting. As a now thirty-plus-year-old male who is still seeking to find a spouse, I have found myself often getting caught up and frustrated with the dating landscape. There are many competing narratives, and depending on your gender, you will find one or the other appealing. Usually, men blame women, and women blame men for the current climate.
Many of these online conversations are ones I have spent some time listening to and trying to understand. One of these is a new trend called “passport bros.” Where men are going overseas to seek a prospective mate as they find the modern Western woman unappealing. Many of the loudest internet personalities promote a “boss bi*#h” lifestyle, and the response of many of these young men is to simply opt out of engaging with these women.
As I have spent a fair amount of time listening to these Internet conversations on this subject, there is a very telling message that fewer and fewer young people are getting married, and those who do are generally waiting much longer than their parents did. In the 1950s, the average age of marriage was 22 for men and 20 for women. Today the average is 29 for men and 27 for women. So might argue this is a good thing, and for some, I have no doubt it is, but on average, this does not seem to be a good thing as reports don’t seem to support the idea that we are happier today as a result of this delay. I hope to do a full-length piece on this subject eventually, as I find social dynamics between the sexes utterly fascinating, especially with the vast array of changes that have been introduced in the last fifty to seventy-five years. I’d love to hear feedback if anyone would be interested in reading a full-length piece on this. No matter what, the one thing that I find hope in is that statistics do not bind my God.
As someone who has always sought to date only with the intention of marriage and yet finding myself still unmarried, it is all too easy to get caught up in the social trends of media and forget that God provides all good things to those who love Him. As I have disengaged from social media and deleted it from my life for periods of time, I find it easier and easier to find rest in this promise that if it is God’s will, I will find what I am looking for, and if it is not His will for me, I will yet trust and obey. He is forever faithful and has never failed me, and He won’t start now. So to those single friends of mine, I hope you find encouragement in this as I have.
What I Learned This Week
We Will Not Be Silenced Part 2
I did end up finishing this book this week, a book that is free with an Audible subscription. The core message of this book was a warning to the modern church. Many forces are coming against the American church. One thing that really stood out to me within this book was the idea that the American church has historically held a “home team” advantage. We, as Christians, may have had opposition in the stands, but we were playing on home turf.
This is changing, for those of us who live in the Bible Belt, we don’t really see it yet, but the enemy is coming for us and will soon be on our doorsteps. There will be a separation of the “fair weather” Christians and those who are truly committed. I do think the enemy has been happy to leave us be for a long time here in America. It gave us time to get soft and weak. Where Christians in other countries are killed for their faith, many here in America are afraid to offend because we fear we may get canceled. We must be ever vigilant.
I have started a second book by the same author called “The Church in Babylon,” and again, it is a sobering message to consider.
Interview with Erwin Lutzer
I recently watched this Podcast interview with Dr. Lutzer and found it to be very engaging and a great conversation on how we as Christians can continue to engage in a culture that is continuing to abandon God. Within this conversation, they ask the question of how Christians should address the issue of using someone’s preferred pronouns. A conversation that I have debated with my Christian friends. My opinion is that I think that it is sinful and an act of willful lying.
There is, in my mind, an obsession even in the church with not wanting to offend anyone, and I think it is dangerous ground that we tread if we think we can manage to truly follow Christ and not offend anyone. Because even Jesus Christ didn’t manage to do that, He was ultimately murdered because of those whom He offended.
We can’t forget that Jesus promised us that the world would hate us. We will have to get used to no longer having home-field advantage. We will have to get used to people hating us and calling us names. We will have to choose if we will stand for what is right and true and what is comfortable.
What I Did this Week
I started studying again, continuing to practice Power-Bi
No Alcohol (35 Days)
My Screentime was definitely up this week, due to redownloading social media apps.
It’s amazing to me how quickly and easily I can get sucked back into a bad habit as I continue to monitor my screen time and be more intentional with how I spend my time.
Thank you for joining me once more for a weekly update. I often find it tempting to sugarcoat or not write about what I’m truly thinking through in fear of what others might think of me. But I hope through this writing, I can learn to communicate honestly, with others my thoughts today but also the evolution of my thoughts. My hope is that anyone who reads this understands that these ideas are evolving thoughts, and I am always open to being corrected as I continue to learn and grow.
