Struggles, Fatherhood & Female Exploitation
Introduction
Another week finished, and another week of learning. This week was another busy week as I continue to understand the scope of my responsibilities within my role as a leader in this new company. A core message, and one that I have written about before, is this idea of “dependence,” and, in this case, dependence on God. As I am learning, I am realizing that there are many new skills that I need to develop and existing skills that I will have to grow, and the one that is at the forefront of my mind is learning how to be a good leader that these men who have been placed under my supervision, and there is a measure of responsibility that I have in helping each of them succeed and how I do that looks different with each one and so learning to listen well to each one and then in turn trust that the Lord will lead me in action and conversation how to lead each of these men well is a responsibility that I aim to take seriously as I move forward.
Within this conversation of dependence, I am also learning to continue to learn and trust in God. I am currently in a personal season of life from which I wish to escape, and answers I am seeking to questions I have asked, and yet God is seemingly quiet and telling me to wait and trust, to not lean on my own understanding but to trust in Him and I must confess most days I do not do this well. Instead, I try to move, and I try to answer the questions myself rather than wait patiently for Him to respond. I find myself constantly doubting, and feeling as though I must be missing what He is saying to me because I am not hearing anything. I am in a season of wrestling with God, and as ever, He has been patient with me as a good Father and allows me to wrestle until I am simply unable to fight anymore, and then we make a little progress, only stubborn ole me then comes back the next day only to wrestle with Him again. So to my readers who are wrestling and seeking answers to questions yet unanswered, I’m with you, and I, too, am wrestling. But I have this great hope and confidence that He who began a good work in me will not stop and will carry it out to its completion no matter how much stubborn wrestling I do along the way, and I hope you find hope and encouragement in that as much as I do!
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What I Learned This Week
Breeders: a subclass of women?
Through my listening of podcasts, I was made aware of Jennifer Lahl, who has and is actively producing documentaries on the subject of concerns for women and the modern technologies that are turning their ability to bear children into a monetizable industry. It is something that seems like the plot of some dystopian novel, and yet it is a reality within our modern world.
It is an industry that is turning children into a product! A product to be purchased, sold, and disposed of if defective. It is treating children as something to be sold and no better than human trafficking, and in my eyes and the eyes of many others, is no different than human trafficking, only now beginning before conception even. The stories that result are stories that are truly heartbreaking.
It is an industry that is turning women into factories, where they become a product for production. The women that are most affected by these global giants are the women who are least equipped to defend themselves. Young women in college are solicited to provide eggs, and then a second party is brought in to bring these children to term in a “rent a womb” service. The stories that result are truly heartbreaking, with both mother and child being collateral damage in the process. Many who volunteer in these practices are well-meaning young women who long to help others.
Anonymous Fathers Day
Anonymous Fathers Day covers the sperm donation industry and tells the stories of many young and old who are the resulting products of “Fertility Services.” The stories they tell are stories of seeking a Father they never knew. These are stories of children who were abandoned before they were ever conceived, a sentiment that is true for both those who do sperm and egg donation.
Behind these industries is one very clear human motivator, “money.” The second motivator is evil itself, a spiritual enemy. An enemy that seeks only to kill and destroy families and the order of God within those families. The sad truth is that often these things are done by individuals with the best intentions or out of desperation.
The question that many fail to ask with these developing technologies is that just because we as a species “can” do these things does not mean we “should.” When we try to improve on God’s design, we always manage to make a bigger mess than the one that we started with. I plan to watch the next documentary in this series of documentaries and will share my thoughts on it next week it is called #BigFertility.
The Man That Makes Millionaires
In this podcast, Steven interviews someone I really enjoy listening to, Alex Hormozi. Alex shares some incredible stories of the trials of his life and the disciplines that have allowed him to get to the place where he is today. Though this episode does not specifically focus on the subject of relationships, Alex shares an incredible story of his now wife and how in one of the lowest moments of his life, he told her that he believed that she should leave him as he saw himself as a sinking ship. At that moment, when he feels utterly defeated, she turns to him, and rather than run, she tells him, “I would sleep with you under a bridge if that’s what it takes.”
Alex observes that he believes this is all men truly want, someone who believes in them when they can no longer believe in themselves. Someone who will see them as a champion when they can no longer see it. As I listened to that, I found this idea really resonated with me.
As I have spent the last few months listening to podcasts on neuro-science and trying to understand what drives me and what the Bible says, one simple message seemed to be clear to me. Men crave respect. Men, in general, long to find someone who will believe in them and help them stand when they feel like they can’t.
From boyhood, there is a desire in young boys to play at being a superhero, at rescuing the princess and protecting her from the big bad dragon, and it seems to me at least this is a natural development in young boys, or at least it was my vision when I was little. I would always play pretend and play rescue, my sisters, from some big scary monster. I wanted to be a hero I wanted to protect. Today there is a common cultural message that seems to tell young boys that they are no longer needed. That there is no longer a princess who needs them because the princesses can all protect and defend themselves.
There is in young men a primal desire to feel “needed” to feel as though they are valuable, and that they are capable. Young men today are being told no one needs them, and so many have retreated in fear of being called toxic.
There is a book I read a while back called “The Boy Crisis” by Warren Farrell, and I am currently in the process of reading a book by Roy Baumeister called “Is there anything good about men” So far, there is a clear message in my eyes, and it is this.
There is a spiritual war taking place against young men, for a nation without men is a nation without defenses. There is a sterilization of sorts happening to young men, and it is happening through the media young men hear, through the images, they are seeing, through the endless meaningless sex they are told they should want, the utter waste of time in video games that they spend, and the glorification of pornography that teaches them how they should view women.
There is a war taking place against young girls and women today, as I have shared and written about clearly in the last 8 weeks of my writing. But make no mistake, there is also a war equally vicious taking place against young men. It’s just not a popular subject, because our current media is obsessed with telling young men that they are the villains and that they are the reason for the troubles of this world. Forgetting all too quickly how many millions of young men have died to create the world and infrastructure that we live in and enjoy today.
Conclusion
A friend of mine recently made an observation that since I began writing these weekly posts, the centerpiece of my attention has been on the subject of women, and the trouble they face. I honestly hadn’t really spent much time thinking through this, but I realized they were correct. It is the rabbit trail that I have been hunting and following over the last few months and one that I suspect I will continue, but I also plan to direct my focus in the coming weeks to the role of fatherhood. My hope at this point is that those who have read my work up to this point will understand that I have a deep love for women and I am endlessly fascinated by the design of God and how He has made us two distinctly different creatures and yet of the same species, and yet we each are so very different, and this is a beautiful thing. We were intended by God’s design to complement one another, not to BE the other, as is now the popular narrative.
This past week a finished a book called “Men Without Work” which I will discuss in further detail next week!
What I did this week
Continuing to try and practice asking better questions
Learning to be more interested than interesting in conversations
21 Days without alcohol
ScreenTime
I spent more time than I would have liked on Instagram and YouTube in total, but I am getting better.
As ever, thank you one and all for taking the time to read my weekly post and join me in my journey of seeking to learn and grow each day, one podcast, audiobook, and conversation at a time.
If you have enjoyed what you read, please consider taking the time to like, share and subscribe to this publication if you have not already! Until next time God bless!
